Talent Building for Better Divine Service

Have you ever compared yourself to someone else? Most of us do it at one point or another. We ask ourselves, why can’t we be as talented, smart, pretty, or fit as someone else? Or we argue, if we had a certain person’s wealth, house, family, job, and so on, our lives would be so much better. It’s easy to get trapped into this kind of thinking, but unfortunately can spiral downward quickly into negative thoughts, low self-esteem, or depression. Instead, it’s critical to focus on our unique individual qualities and the purpose they serve.  

Hashem created each of us with a specific set of abilities and talents. He also endowed us with the capacity to achieve particular goals. The hard part is that it’s up to us to understand, appreciate, and hone our talents, as well as determine our mission in life. In Parshat Vayechi, we see Yaakov bless each of his sons. Interestingly enough, he does not give the same blessing to all of them. Yaakov recognizes each of their individual qualities and blesses them accordingly. For example, we know that Yehuda had great leadership skills and strength and is thus blessed with kingship. Zevulun will live on the seashore and therefore, Rashi says, will be engaged in trade and business¹. He will support Yissachar, who also according to Rashi, will bear the responsibility of learning Torah². And so it continues for each of the shevatim (tribes)—a blessing from Yaakov that highlights each tribe’s unique talent. While they are blessed with different gifts, it is up to them to use them in the service of Hashem and hopefully, succeed in fulfilling their life’s purpose.

We may not have Yaakov to give us a bracha, but if we are in tune with our personalities and traits, we can come to discover our talents on our own. If we think of those things we know we are good at or those aspects people frequently compliment us on, we will come closer to pinpointing our strengths. Here are some questions to help: Do I excel at a certain subject matter? Am I an excellent listener, orator, writer? Do I possess organizational, leadership, or planning skills? Is there a particular population that I am passionate about working with (e.g., children, older adults, the homeless, etc.)? By answering these questions and more, we can extract what special abilities Hashem has given us. 

Whether we know it or not, Hashem put each of us on this Earth to accomplish a mission with the talents He gave us. And if that is the case, then certainly there should be no reason to compare ourselves with or become jealous over someone else’s individual qualities.

The next question—what is our purpose in life—is a lot harder to answer. Whether we know it or not, Hashem put each of us on this Earth to accomplish a mission with the talents He gave us. And if that is the case, then certainly there should be no reason to compare ourselves with or become jealous over someone else’s individual qualities. To be clear, it’s okay to admire another person’s good traits in order to improve ourselves. But sometimes comparison can lead to cognitive distortion. We begin to circulate statements in our brains like: I’m not good enough. Everyone is better off than me. She’s good at everything and I’m good at nothing. It is at these moments (if not before) that we must remind ourselves that, regardless of anyone else, we are here for a specific purpose of our own. If we look in the Torah again, we can see an excellent illustration of this. Despite the fact that Aharon is older, Moshe is chosen to lead the Jewish people out of Mitzrayim. Does he complain? Is he jealous that his younger brother is selected for the awesome task? On the contrary, Hashem tells Moshe that Aharon “will be happy to see you”³. Ramban comments on this to mean that Aharon rejoiced in his heart at Moshe being chosen, and the Or HaChaim points out that because Aharon was happy for his younger brother, he was granted the High Priesthood. There is no room for jealousy or comparison because Aharon understands that he and his brother have different missions in life.

In Parshat Va’eira, we see the names of Moshe and Aharon flipped in two verses. In one verse⁴ it says “this is Aharon and Moshe,” and at the end of the next verse⁵ (6:27) it is written “this is Moshe and Aharon.” The question comes up, why does the Torah put Aharon first in one sentence and Moshe first in the other? There are a number of explanations, but the one that fits our topic, explains that Moshe and Aharon were equally important⁶. Commenting on this point, R’ Moshe Feinstein says that “Moses and Aaron, even though they differed in their abilities, could be considered equal since both achieved their full potential”⁷. Each succeeded in accomplishing what Hashem had set out for them to do. It wasn’t that Aharon had to be as great as Moshe—Aharon had to be as great as Aharon potentially could be. And this is a point we can all learn from. We don’t have to be as artistic, smart, strong, etc. as anyone else. We simply have to utilize our G-d given abilities to its fullest. By doing so, we have the capacity to not only succeed in achieving our life goals, but like Aharon, perhaps rejoice in the accomplishments of others too.  

While none of us can comprehend what our full capabilities might be, when we use our skills in the service of Hashem and focus on our individual abilities rather than comparing ourselves to others, we can accomplish a great deal. Life is not about how much better we are than someone else or vice versa. The purpose in life is about being as great as Hashem created each of us to be. And the question we need to repeatedly ask ourselves is: With what I’ve been given, am I living my life to its fullest potential?

¹ Rashi 49:13

² Rashi 49:14

³ Shemot 4:14

⁴ Shemot 6:26

⁵ Shemot 6:27

⁶ Rashi Va’eira 6:26

⁷ Darash Moshe, Mesorah Publications, 1994; p. 102