After her friend shared with her a promising Shidduch prospect, Yaelโs excitement became palpable. From what she heard, the boy has several of the qualities she was looking for: good middot, serious in his Torah learning, and intelligent. However, her enthusiasm was quickly shattered when she picked up the phone: โIโm sorry, Yael”, said her friend. He doesnโt want to go out with a convert.โ Yael made a big effort to conceal her disappointment. โThank you for trying,โ she heard herself say.
Yaelโs mesirut nefesh to become Jewish was remarkable. She had left her family, her friends, her hometown and her entire set of beliefs to embrace Hashemโs Torah. Throughout her conversion classes, she was taught that the Torah commands us no fewer than 36 times (some count 46!)1 to treat converts with love and sensitivity. She remembered studying with great amazement the following pesukim: “When a convert lives among you in your land, do not mistreat him. The convert shall be like one of your citizens, and you shall love him as yourself, for you were strangers in the land of Egypt.”2. Not only is there a prohibition against oppressing the convert, but thereโs also a positive commandment to love them โ on par with โืืืืืช ืืจืขื ืืืืโ.3
Why is it then that Yael kept being rejected for being a convert? Shouldnโt she receive a tremendous amount of prospects due to ther status?
As we approach the holiday of Shavuot, whose central theme is Megillat Ruth, the Jewish peopleโs quintessential convert, it behooves upon us to understand the halachic and hashkafic ramifications of conversion to Judaism, and help us work on developing extreme care and sensitivity towards converts.
The Halachic Process of Accepting a Candidate for Conversion
When Ruth approached Naomi and expressed her desire to convert, she first tries to dissuade her. The Talmud in Yevamot 47a-b understands this interaction as a halachic dialogue, wherein Naomi outlines the challenges of Jewish life, and Ruth’s steadfast responses demonstrate her sincere commitment. This exchange establishes the principle that a potential convert should be informed of the difficulties ahead. If they persist, and demonstrate their unwavering commitment to Jewish life, they are to be accepted.โ
Based on this interaction, the Gemara outlines the steps that a Beit Din must undertake if a potential candidate approaches them for conversion:
- A potential convert must be initially discouraged and told about the challenges and obligations.
- If they persist, they are taught some of the easier as well as some of the more difficult commandments.
- They must accept the yoke of mitzvot willingly.
The Talmud continues by saying:
A gentile who comes to convert is told: “What did you see that motivated you to come to convert?” We tell him, ‘Do you not know that Israel at this time is afflicted, oppressed, harassed, and tormented, and hardships come upon them?’ If he says, ‘I know and I am not worthy,’ we accept him immediately.”
The Midrash reads Ruth’s unwavering commitment to Jewish faith as acceptance of core halachot:
| Phrase in Ruthโs Responses | Halachic Acceptance |
| “ืึดึผื ืึถื-ืึฒืฉึถืืจ ืชึตึผืึฐืึดื ืึตืึตืึฐ” โ “Wherever you go, I will go” | Acceptance of techum Shabbat |
| “ืึผืึทืึฒืฉึถืืจ ืชึธึผืึดืื ึดื ืึธืึดืื” โ “Where you lodge, I will lodge” | Acceptance of laws of yichud and tzniut |
| “ืขึทืึตึผืึฐ ืขึทืึดึผื” โ “Your people shall be my people” | Acceptance of being a full-fledged member of the Jewish people |
| “ืึตืืึนืงืึดืึฐ ืึฑืึนืงื” โ “Your God is my God” | Acceptance of believing in Hashem and the entire Torah |
Why Ruth Is the Perfect Convert
- Strong commitment โ Naomi discouraged her by stressing the difficulties of being a Jew; Ruth insisted.
- Acceptance of mitzvot โ As derived from each phrase she says.
- Understanding of hardship โ She knew being a Jew was not easy.
- Pure intention โ She wasnโt converting for marriage or gain, but because she was truly committed to Hashem and His Torah.
- Life integration โ Her faith and Jewish identity became an integral part of her being.
Ruth as the Model for How We Should Treat Converts
Ruthโs inspiring story not only serves as the cornerstone of the halachic process a potential convert must undergo, but also as an example of how to love a convert. In the Megilla4, Boazโs extreme consideration towards Ruth is evident when he tells her to stay with his maidens, eat and drink freely. Additionally5, he invites her to his table, gives her food, and makes her feel part of the community. The Midrash6 praises Boaz for this, saying: “He drew her close with words of peace and affection, so that others would follow his example.”
***
Yaelโs story is sadly one of many. The story of Megillat Ruth, and the Torahโs emphasis on how to love and care for converts, propel us to revisit our behavior towards those who have left everything behind to join the ranks of Hashemโs Chosen people. This Shavuot, may we all have the merit to develop extreme sensitivity towards converts, to care for and love them, and thus accumulate countless blessings and mitzvot. Chag Sameach!
This article was originally published on Her Tribe, a new vibrant magazine for Anglo Jewish women. To get your copy of Her Tribe, go to: https://tinyurl.com/HerTribeShavuot
- Bava Metzia 59b โฉ๏ธ
- Vayikra 19:33โ34 โฉ๏ธ
- The Sifrei goes as far to say that the commandement โืึทืึฒืึทืึฐืชึถึผื ืึถืชึพืึทืึตึผืจโ, to love a convert, is in addition to the general command to love your fellow Jew. โฉ๏ธ
- Ruth 2:8โ9 โฉ๏ธ
- Ruth 2:14 โฉ๏ธ
- Ruth Rabbah 4:3 โฉ๏ธ
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