Rebbetzin Bruria Hutner David: What’s In A Name?

My focus in writing for Tzofia has, thus far, been on Jewish women throughout history. Reaching back to the times of Tanach, including Michal, daughter of King Saul, to those of more recent years, such as Nechama Leibowitz or Rebbetzin Weinberg, we have found the strength of each one’s middot, or character traits, to be more inspiring than the next. In researching this next woman, however, I am finding myself more awe-stricken than ever before. Whether proven through her profound knowledge of the Maharal of Prague’s teachings, or her assisting both her renowned father and husband in completing their own publications, reading, in a way, hints at the “awe” we are instructed to have for Hakodosh Baruch Hu, in this precious life we are given; she herself expounds upon the idea of self-conduct. Rebbetzin Bruria Hutner David, her first name being a surprise to many, continues to teach us from the hearts of those who knew her, write about her, and share her character from which we can aspire to emulate. 

As mentioned, many rabbanim have questioned Rav Yitzchak Hutner’s decision to name his daughter (and only child) Bruria. Rabbi Yair Hoffman, an online writer, gives his readers an insight as to why her name raises eyebrows. Bruria was the daughter of Rav Chananya ben Tradyon, and the wife of the great Tannaitic sage, Rabbi Meir. Hoffman describes a “disturbing incident recorded in Rashi in Avodah Zarah 18b”: Rashi appears to indict her for two very serious offenses – that of taking one’s own life and that of, when greatly challenged, marital infidelity¹. It is important to note that Bruria was an incredibly righteous woman who is praised throughout the Gemara. Still, Rav Hutner decided to remain silent about his reasoning for choosing such a name for his daughter². 

We must understand how suicide is viewed in Judaism. In short, Shaar Bitachon, or The Gates of Trust, explain that a person’s life does not belong to him or her; our souls belong to G-d. One is punished for taking his or her own life as they’d be punished for murder.

Rebbetzin Bruria David was born in 1938 to her parents Rav Yitzchak and Masha Hutner and was their only child³. Although her parents’ reason for naming her Bruria remains a mystery, we are certain of this: one’s name gives insight into their character, particularly in that Hebrew (lashon hakodesh) is Hashem’s language; a Jew’s Hebrew name is his or her Divine essence. We also know that Jews are above their mazal  (ein mazal l’yisrael)⁴, and have no determined fate/destiny based on the month, day, and time they are born. However, when someone is given a name, this does indicate his or her unique mission on earth. “When the soul inhabits the body, it draws life into it by means of the (Hebrew) name.”⁵ Some have speculated that Rebbetzin Bruria’s unique, and unlikely name was a tikkun for the offenses of Rabbi Meir’s wife. What was it that she rectified in her life – if the aveiras, or sins, of her namesake, were suicide and adultery? 

For one, we must understand how suicide is viewed in Judaism. In short, Shaar Bitachon, or The Gates of Trust, explain that a person’s life does not belong to him or her; our souls belong to G-d. One is punished for taking his or her own life as they’d be punished for murder⁶. Secondly, how does the Torah view infidelity? Breaking the seventh commandment, by cheating on one’s spouse (amongst other adulterous behavior), will lead one to incurring the death penalty. Why is this relevant? When we understand Rebbetzin Bruria’s life, based on her actions, we will see that she did indeed rectify the sins of Bruria, as described in the Gemara.

Firstly, in direct opposition to putting an end to one’s life, G-d forbid, Bruria cherished her days, and took them seriously. As described by her students, who she preferred to be personally connected to (rather than sharing herself publicly), “Rebbetzin David sought to have [them] live and move through the world with a dignity and weightiness born of our essential importance as human beings and as Jews. She abhorred silliness and meaninglessness. Relaxation, or regeneration, certainly. But being silly? Life was meant to be lived with seriousness of purpose.” Additionally, those remembering Rebbetzin Bruria say “she spent her days in continuous growth and learning”. Rabbi Nachman teaches that the antithesis to depression (or suicide) is moving forward. Movement indicates and arouses emunah, or faith⁷. Rebbetzin Bruria surely moved, and in doing so, made life happen for herself, and thousands of other religious women. Due to her ample “movement”, she came to be the founder and dean of the famous Beth Jacob of Jerusalem – a dream of her father’s – that she “single-handedly turned into the “Harvard”, or the “Slabodka”, of Jewish religious girls seminaries” anywhere in the world. “BJJ” is as high-caliber as its founder (who herself graduated from Columbia University with a PHD), and remains one of the most esteemed Torah institutions for post-high school women, its admissions process even referred to as “elitist”⁸. Life was serious, to Rebbetzin Bruria, and was meant to be taken seriously. 

Secondly, in direct opposition to infidelity, Rebbetzin Bruria lived by the blessing given to her by her father: “[You should be] a great woman in her own right who also excels as a helper to her husband. The fulfillment of this ideal requires three conditions: 1) that she be a great woman in her own right, 2) that she have a husband who is greater than she is, and 3) that she place her innate greatness at the service of the fulfillment of her husband’s aspirations.”⁹ Rather than straying from her marriage, either in body or mind, Rebbetzin Bruria heeded the words of her father, and stood beside her husband every step of the way. She even carried on the lesson of being an ezer kenegdo, or helper “against” him”  to one’s husband, to her female students. “Rebbetzin David didn’t just make it acceptable for girls to marry Torah learners; she made it chashuv, or important, and desirable for Bais Yaakov girls. She once said that the distinctiveness of klal Yisrael is that they turn their backs on the rest of society. When a woman gets married, she becomes assur k’hekdesh, or “off-limits” to other men, in every sense. “The same dynamic occurred when the Yidden accepted the Torah at Har Sinai. We became dedicated to Hashem’s Torah to the exclusion of everything else,” explained Rebbetzin Bruria, to her students.¹⁰ From this, we understand how devout Rebbetzin Bruria was to both her husband, and the idea of marriage sanctification itself. 

Lastly, to vouch for Bruria, Rabbi Meir’s wife (who should not be recalled only for her aveiras, or sins), she is respected throughout the Gemara for having finished many of her husband’s Torah shiurim, or lessons, and her righteousness. Similarly, it is noted that, after Rav Hutner’s passing in 1980, whom Rebbetzin Bruria dedicated much of her life to, Rebbetzin David did everything in conjunction with her husband including editing and writing their own master works. Even when fulfilling her father’s dreams (of establishing a Torah institution for young women, as her husband was creating for young men), Rebbetzin Bruria only did so with the full input and consultation of  her husband, Rav Yonosan David. Bruria of the Gemara should not be faulted for her sins, especially due to the context, which is beyond the scope of this article. Having completed her mission on this earth (passing in 2023), Rebbetzin Bruria Hutner David seemed to have “rectified” her namesake’s noted shortcomings; however, the two women shared the scholarship and ability to make tremendous “movement” for Torah.

1. Rashi on Avodah Zarah 18b ↩︎
2. Hoffman, R. Y. (2023, June 27). Why did Rav Hutner ZT”L name his daughter a”h, Bruriah? The Yeshiva World:https://www.theyeshivaworld.com/news/headlines-breaking-stories/2203380/why-did-rav-hutner-ztl-name-his-daughter-ah-bruriah.html   ↩︎
3. Rudomin, R. Y. (2023, May 7). Shloshim: Remembering Rebbetzin Bruria Hutner david. Israel National News. https://www.israelnationalnews.com/news/371060   ↩︎
4. Talmud (Shabbos 156) ↩︎
5. Tanya, Chapter 1 of Shaar HaYichud VehaEmunah ↩︎
6. Rambam, Laws of the Murderer and Preservation of Life, Chapter 2 ↩︎
7. Rebbe Nachman of Breslov, Likutey Moharan ↩︎
8. Press Schwartz, R. (2023, June 2). Rebbetzin Bruria Hutner David, 1938–2023. Tablet Magazine. https://www.tabletmag.com/sections/history/articles/rebbetzin-bruria-hutner-david   ↩︎
9. Brand, R. E., By, & Ami Magazine. (2023, April 19). Remembering Rebbetzin Bruria David, a”h. Ami Magazine. https://amimagazine.org/2023/04/19/remembering-rebbetzin-bruria-david-ah/   ↩︎
10. Brand, R. E., By, & Ami Magazine. (2023, April 19). Remembering Rebbetzin Bruria David, a”h. Ami Magazine. https://amimagazine.org/2023/04/19/remembering-rebbetzin-bruria-david-ah/  
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