Explaining The Prohibition of Kol Isha

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In Shir Hashirim, the allegorical love song between Hashem and His chosen people, Shlomo Hamelech praises the beauty of the woman’s voice: …Ki koleich arev¹ – because your voice is sweet. It is from these words that the Gemara² learns the dictum that kol b’isha ervah, a principle which often rings offensive to the modern ear and is controversial even in Orthodox circles. Let’s unpack the definitions, laws, and leniencies within this simple phrase.

The Halachic Roots

The simple translation of kol is voice, and indeed that Gemara cites Rav Yehuda quoting Rav Shmuel that the very voice of a woman is ervah. That is clearly not the accepted psak, as the Rema indicates in Orach Chaim 75:3, that kol b’isha refers only to a woman’s singing voice. The Tur and Bet Shmuel, in the same place, concur. Here, the laws discussed pertain to the case of a man saying shema in the presence of his wife’s ervah. The halacha forbids a man to recite shema when his wife is singing, which generally applies to saying any tefillot or berachot.

The Shulchan Aruch brings up kol isha again in the section of even ha’ezer, where general matters of tzniut and boundaries between men and women are discussed³. Importantly, the Rosh here highlights that the general prohibition of kol isha applies even when the man is not engaged in tefillah⁴. As a category of ervah, kol isha is thus subject to the standard exclusions, and a man may listen to the singing of his wife, mother, daughter, and according to some opinions, sister⁵, so long as he is not saying devarim she’bekdushah.

Leniencies

One well-known heter for women singing in public applies for categories of song that are inherently non-arousing. The Sdei Chemed⁶ quotes the Diveri Chefetz that children’s songs, shabbat zemirot, and songs of mourning for the dead are not included in the issur of kol isha. The Sdei Chemed does not ultimately accept this psak.

A more controversial heter is the halachic principle of “trei kolin lo mishtamei”, that two voices cannot be simultaneously heard. This originally refers to the reading of the Torah⁷, where two people may not read at once so the congregation can easily make out the words. Originally found in the writings of the Chasan Sofer⁸, this perspective maintains that women may join a choir of songs if their individual voices are indiscernible. The Tzitz Eliezer⁹ maintains it is not clear that the Chasan Sofer himself would rule according to this leniency.

Rav Yechiel Yaakov Weinberg¹⁰ traveled from Poland to Germany in the early 20th century, and in a letter, describes the practice he came upon in Germany of women joining in with the zemirot. He cites Rav Shamshon Raphael Hirsch as having approved this minhag, and although he ultimately does not find the rationale for the leniency satisfying, he defends the use of this heter in Germany. It is notable that the specific setting where Rav Weinberg encountered this question was within a mixed Jewish youth group with parameters similar to today’s kiruv groups.

The majority of poskim, among them the Beer Sheva¹¹, the Tzitz Eliezer¹², and the Shevet Halevi¹³, explicitly maintain that the principle of trei kolin cannot apply for singing. One counterargument cites the halacha for reading megillah, where two people are permitted to read at once¹⁴, because the dearness of the mitzvah will make people extra vigilant to pick up the words. This is easily extractable to the case of a man who desires to follow the voice of a woman in a crowd.

The most confusing, and increasingly relevant, leniencies revolve around female singing that is prerecorded, where the singer cannot be seen. There are poskim¹⁵ who permit listening to such music, based on the premise that improper thoughts are brought about through the eyes – lo sasuru… acharei eineichem. The listener must not have ever seen the singer or even a picture of her in order for this heter to apply. The Beit She’erim¹⁶, among others, considers it technically permissible but still improper. Others specify that listening for pleasure remains forbidden.

The desire to express ourselves and our talents is a fundamental human drive. If we are able to channel this energy through the corridors defined by Halacha, we can not only effectively display our own skills, but also serve as a representative of Hashem in doing that. To build something powerful and beautiful within the confines of the Divine boundaries is the very definition of human empowerment, and there can be no greater creative joy.

A novel approach is brought by the Tzitz Eliezer¹⁷ about such kol isha. He says that recorded music is not technically a song at all, but rather electronic waves that are perceived as such, and thus are not considered the voice of a woman. If accepted, this leniency might theoretically apply to videos of a woman singing; however, it’s clear that he only uses this rationale on top of the previous leniency of not seeing the singer. The most this clarifies is that listening to women’s singing through the radio is preferable to attending a live concert.

To Heed His Voice

In a Western culture that is hyper fixated on the male-female relationship in the most graphic way, there is little left to the imagination and virtually nothing to be considered sacred or private. In this climate, many women have become numb to the sensuality and power of their singing voice, and feel shut out and mistreated by these laws.

Sometimes it is okay just to contend with that struggle. As frum Jews, we follow a code of law that transcends both societal trends and personal desires, and only because of our steadfast commitment to that greater system are we still around as a nation.

It is also important to remember that the female voice is inherently beautiful and compelling, and we can use our gifts appropriately to honor Hashem. Singing is a deeply meaningful and even spiritual exercise for women as much as men, and we are entirely empowered to use it, just as Miriam the prophetess did after the miracle of kriat yam suf. “And Miriam took the drum in her hand, and all the women went after her… Miriam said: Sing to Hashem, for He is exalted…” ¹⁸ Miriam led the women in a most beautiful display of joyous gratitude to Hashem, the spontaneous expression of jubilant song, and is resoundingly praised for her actions.

Singing is also a source of livelihood for some, and it can be painful and frustrating for a singer with ambition to have to curtail her reach only within her own side of the mechitza. Orthodox women in this space are creating a remarkable new industry, music by women and for women that speaks to our unique strengths, and yes, limitations.