Interview with Stacey Goldman, Yoetzet Halacha

Taharat Hamishpacha is a cornerstone of marital Jewish life, and has preserved the sanctity of the Jewish people through the hardest times. While Jewish women typically seek guidance from Rabbis to ask questions about family purity, many of them don’t feel comfortable sharing matters of intimacy with men.   

Additionally, thousands of women in certain factions of the Jewish world only encountered Taharat Hamishpacha later in life, and what came so naturally to others felt unnatural and strange to them at first, and yet they chose to put Hashem and His Commandments before their own personal pleasures and inclinations. These women therefore need a feminine ear to validate their feelings and give them a sense of trust to share their journey with a female advisor.

Stacey Goldman is one of those pioneers who provides these women with such a need through her role as a Yoetzet Halacha in Philadelphia. 

Nishmat, an advanced Torah learning institution for women in Jerusalem, played a pivotal role in Stacey’s journey to becoming a Yoetzet Halacha. Rabbi and Rabbanit Henkin, founders of Nishmat, devised the role of a Yoetzet Halacha, which literally means “legal advisor”, to advise women on matters of family purity and intimacy for those who feel less comfortable discussing them with a man. Yoatzot Halacha follow a thorough training of two years where they learn in-depth the halachot and customs of family purity, after which they serve as halachic advisors for the community in which they live.

After Stacey graduated from College, she learned at Nishmat from 1996-1997. This year was significant not only for her personal development but also for the broader Jewish community. It was during this time that Rabbanit Chana Henkin began interviewing candidates for the first cohort of yoatzot halacha. While Stacey knew that she would be returning to America with her husband, who was pursuing a business degree, she always knew that becoming a Yoetzet Halacha was something she wanted to pursue at some point.

In 2017, Stacey’s dream became a reality when Nishmat opened up an experimental group of Yoetzet Halacha for women across the United States and Canada on Zoom. This allowed Stacey, at the age of 44, to participate in the program and fulfill her long-held passion of becoming a Yoetzet Halacha.

Stacey’s role as a Yoetzet Halacha is multifaceted, focusing primarily on providing guidance and support to women in matters related to taharat hamishpacha. As a Yoetzet Halacha, she is trained extensively in the halachic intricacies of these laws, which include the halachot of mikveh immersion and intimate relations within Jewish marriage. Yoatzot are both familiar with intricate and often complex halachot that revolve around family purity and a woman’s health, and also possessed the familiarity of what women were leaving behind and could embrace and support them as they discovered a new world.

One of the key aspects of Stacey’s role is to assist women in formulating halachic questions that are relevant to their personal situations. This involves understanding the nuances of their personal circumstances and providing guidance on how to navigate halachic obligations in a way that is both halachically sound and sensitive to their needs.

Many criticize the role of Yoatzot Halacha as they fear that they allow themselves to  give psak Halacha or seek to replace their male counterparts. This is not at all the case. Stacey explains: “As Yoatzot Halacha, we are trained to be respectful of the rabbinic system and to consult with rabbis when necessary. I provide guidance to women on issues related to family purity, fertility, and other areas where Jewish law intersects with women’s health”

Stacey also plays a crucial role in educating women about the halachic principles that underlie taharat hamishpacha. This includes explaining the sources and reasoning behind the laws, as well as helping women understand the practical halachot in their daily lives.

In addition to her work with individual women, Stacey collaborates closely with rabbis in her community to ensure that her guidance is in line with halachic standards. While she is knowledgeable in the areas of taharat hamishpacha and women’s health, she defers to rabbis on more complex or sensitive halachic questions that fall outside her expertise. 

Many criticize the role of Yoatzot Halacha as they fear that they allow themselves to  give psak Halacha or seek to replace their male counterparts. This is not at all the case. Stacey explains: “As Yoatzot Halacha, we are trained to be respectful of the rabbinic system and to consult with rabbis when necessary”. ” I provide guidance to women on issues related to family purity, fertility, and other areas where Jewish law intersects with women’s health,” Stacey explains. “I work closely with my rabbi and view my role as complementing the work of rabbis in the community.”

Stacey is passionate about helping women navigate the complexities, and discovering the beauty of Jewish law with sensitivity, compassion, and halachic integrity despite facing resistance from some in the Orthodox community who questioned the need for such a role. 

Stacey has a steadfast committment to her work, seeing it as a way to help women observe Jewish law more authentically. She believes that by providing women with accurate halachic information, she can empower them to make informed decisions about their religious observance.

In Stacey’s own words: . “My goal is to help women navigate complex halachic issues in a way that is both sensitive and halachically sound. “In my work, I have seen firsthand how women can benefit from having access to halachic knowledge and guidance,” Stacey reflects. “By empowering women to make informed decisions about their religious observance, we are strengthening the fabric of our community and ensuring that halacha not only remains relevant, but also transforms our lives.”

Photo provided by Stacey Goldman